


Faded Fire

by Elrondage (orphan_account)



Category: The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types, The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: All of Elrond's partners are Alphas, Alpha!Celebrian, Alpha/Omega Dynamics, Asexual/Sex Repulsed Elrond, Blow Jobs, Dubious Consent, F/M, Identity Issues, Incest, Literal Unresolved Sexual Tension, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Multi, Omega!Elrond, Restraints - Non BDSM, Self-Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, Twincest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-21
Updated: 2015-09-21
Packaged: 2018-04-22 16:56:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4843169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Elrondage
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The cycle never ends.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Faded Fire

**Author's Note:**

> Whoo boy. Where to start...first, I don't know what happened. I wrote this after a discussion on ABO dynamics with an acquaintance on Tumblr clearing up my misconceptions. I am not into ABO dynamics normally, though certain fics have piqued my interest as you can find in my bookmarks. I tried to take her information to heart, since I'm very open-minded about things I'm not quite into and we got very in-depth about things I thought I'd be uncomfortable with. Turns out I wasn't and I even decided to write a fic, so I don't know, people can change mindsets. Go open-mindedness. :D
> 
> Second, I'm sure there's probably something severe that I didn't tag, so if I missed something, please let me know. I always tag the most triggering content first to let people know there's going to be intense shit. I'm not asexual, farthest from it one could be I suppose, so I'm not sure if I went too far with this or not. I apologize if so, but I have always seen Elrond as asexual and sex-repulsed at that. Also, my OC is not going to be a major part of the fic, mostly just a mention of him, so no worries if OCs in fic aren't your thing. Frankly, they're really not mine either unless they're well-made.
> 
> Third, I have never written blatant porn of any kind before. In all honesty, I never felt comfortable doing so before this and so I apologize if it's worded terribly. I'm trying something new. 
> 
> I can't stop writing about Elrond and I'm tempted to give up the good fight and just let it happen. Sue me.

The visiting company from Lothlorien kept Elrond busy from sunrise to sunset. From requests to access library sections closed to public use to more wine or more food, he was running around frantically trying to keep things in order. Many elves came and with that meant more guest accommodation issues and more stress on his part to impress. Caras Galadhon was a wonderful city and Imladris had to be at least half as glamorous as their home.

Lindir brought Elrond yet another summons while he wrote in his journal his expenditures for the visit.

"You're requested to take tea with the lady Celebrian and her associates."

Oh, great.

"Tell her I'm afraid I cannot attend, Lindir, I have much work to do here." Elrond replied, never looking up from his journal. A slight reddish tinge dusted his cheeks for he had something of an attraction to the lady. One sided, most likely nothing would come of it, but even so it was a daunting task. "Do send my apologies."

"My lord…she insisted and said tea would not be served until you arrived. It would not do to have your guests be served cold tea." Lindir pointed out, a small smile on his face. "I think you are required to go, if not by choice then by societal propriety."

"Galadriel's daughter has gained the cunning of her mother..." Elrond groaned, setting his pen in the inkwell before getting up. "Let me get into proper clothing fit for tea, I'm a mess..."

"You're fine the way you are, my lord. Dare I detect a hint of anxiety in you?"

"Nonsense, I'm perfectly fine." Elrond quickly braided his hair back, the way he always wore his hair to tea. "Then let me just go down to the kitchens and-"

"No, Lord Elrond, you're going to tea in the main courtyard." Lindir's face lit up and it was obvious he was amused. Had he caught onto his affections for the lady Celebrian? "I'll handle anything you and the guests might need."

"Very well." Elrond looked in a mirror to make sure he was as elegant as possible.

He made his way down to the courtyard where a table was laden with small finger foods and places for seven teacups. Only one was still unfilled and Elrond sat in the vacant seat. The guests smiled and welcomed him, the lady Celebrian nodding.

"It is wonderful to have you join us, Lord Elrond. We were just about to find Lindir and have him fetch you from your books."

Her laugh was delicate, much like her features, and Elrond felt a pang of affection.

"It's fine, I am...pleased to make your acquaintance." Elrond replied, trying desperately to keep the stammer out of his voice. He was not an elfling, vying for a girl's love, he was a lord and a warrior!

"As with yours." her eyes locked with his and Elrond's heart beat twice as fast.

The banter went on easily between them and the group as a whole, discussing political matters and more social ones.

A familiar and utterly loathed warmth washed over Elrond about an hour in, making him nearly drop his teacup. Apparently even if he hadn't something had attracted the attention of his guests, Celebrian's face falling in worry. It was a moment later that he realized he'd been cut off mid sentence, shock and terror evident on his features. One of the guests, an educator, sized him up.

"My lord, are you well?"

His last spell hadn't been more than a couple of months ago, he shouldn't have been in heat so soon again. The others' eyes seemed to bore right through him as his collar felt as if it had become a noose around his neck. His voice was strained but he tried to keep it from wavering.

"I must leave, I have urgent business to attend to."

He left the table without another word, whispers following him as he left.

He had no time to travel to his secluded second home within the deep forests of the north where few ever tread, he would be on the ground incapacitated before he made it halfway. Surely then he would be preyed on by the local animal life, an Alpha passing by, or worse, a pack of Orcs that had roamed too far westward on errands unknown.

The bedroom, then. 

Finding his way he was stopped by Lindir who frowned.

"My lord? Why are you not at tea?"

"I do not feel well, Lindir." Elrond grit his teeth, his tone one of impatience. "I am going to lie down. Go tend to the guests, please, and have Erestor take over in my stead. No one is to approach my home without my permission, including yourself, until I am well again. I am ill and it would do everyone well if they stayed away."

"Shall I call for a healer?" Lindir offered, though the harsh slam of the bedroom door behind him gave his servant his answer. Elrond heard Lindir's hurried footsteps as he left, sighing in relief before getting to work.

He moved a heavy bookcase in front of the door after locking it thrice, one with a key lock, something he never really had to do. He liked the security. He didn't want anyone entering and he would make sure it would be difficult to leave himself.

He had to keep this a secret.

Elrond found the ankle restraints that he kept in the back of his nightstand drawer for just this reason. He undressed, baring himself to the air that would soon feel cold to him with the chill of winter despite the Valley's weather being pereptually fair. He snapped the restraints on once he was ready, connecting them to hidden hooks on the bedpost. He wouldn't be leaving the bed and he would be face up so no connection with the bedding could be made with his rapidly hardening length. 

He would endure this sudden heat once again as he had many times before.

\----

_"Brother? What's the matter?"_

_He felt warm. Everywhere. His skin felt like it wanted to crawl away and leave him to drown in liquid warmth. Sweat dotted his forehead and he panted from it all. He had no idea why he was like this, it came on while he was doing paperwork. All he knew was that Elros could solve it._

_"Don't just stand there, Elrond, come on in. You look terrible."_

_He couldn't move. Every movement he made made his hard-on brush against his loose trousers, sending a rush of warmth to him yet again and creating a damp patch in the fabric as his cock leaked steadily. The struggle to keep from moaning alone made his legs weak and made his lithe frame tremble._

_"What's wrong? Are you ill?"_

_The words barely registered to him. Was this an illness? It didn't feel like one, not one he knew of at least despite his study of medicine, though he was still a novice. He shook his head, propping himself up by the door frame which made his pants fabric brush against him again. This time he couldn't hold back the moan that escaped his lips, turning a dark shade of pink._

_Elros got up from his chair at that, concern laced in his tone. He clearly hadn't noticed the state of his brother's trousers. "You should be in bed if you're so far gone. Come then, I'll take care of you."_

_He noticed Elros sniff the air. "Do you smell that? It's wonderful...like a nice ale but sweeter."_

_He shook his head again. He knew nothing except for the heat that Elros' calm hands exuded as he was led to the bed. As soon as Elros sat on the edge Elrond took no time in straddling his lap, pupils blown wide with lust. Elros could fix this._

_"What are you doing?"_

_He kissed him hard, the kiss needy and rushed. A firm hand twisted in his hair and yanked his head back though, eliciting a pained whimper from him._

_"What has gotten into you, Elrond?!"_

_He didn't know._

_"I-I...don't...know…"_

_Elros' expression was mixed. Apprehension, surprise, confusion...all were present. "Do you need a healer?"_

_He shook his head, the urge to rut against his brother's leg overtaking him, moans and whines escaping his lips as his hips canted. "N-Need...you…"_

_Elros shook his head, maneuvering out from under his weight. "Not like this. I would give you what you ask but you're clearly not yourself, Elrond. I want someone to take a look at you. First, I need to make sure you don't leave, though."_

_The restraints started from the first time. He didn't know why Elros had them and didn't ask afterward. One of his wrists were bound and his legs left free but under a blanket. He writhed, crying out as Elros left him._

_"Please...p-please don't leave me!"_

_His throat nearly gave out with his screams._

_Elros came back agonizing minutes later with Maglor in tow. The latter's eyes widened in shock and realization._

_He twisted in the restraint yet again, whimpering pathetically. The friction from his trousers was only a tease, a cruel one at that. The front of them were completely soaked by now as he rutted into the air, trying to feel something close to what he needed. The blanket had been kicked off of him by that point and his pants were falling down because they were a size too large. His cock had begun to free itself from them with all of the movement, creating an obscene partially covered bulge. He didn't want to touch himself, though, he disliked the feeling of sticky fluids on his hands and it never felt as good as when Elros would do it. Still, he craved to touch, gripping the sheets hard enough to tear them instead. His voice was rough with need and with the screams he'd let out, tears pricking at the edges of his eyes. He tried to listen to their conversation but the intensity of the sensations nearly drowned it out._

_"...that scent wasn't from the kitchens, Elros." Maglor spoke quietly, turning to the unrestrained twin. "That was from Elrond. Elrond is an omega and you are an alpha..."_

_Shouts, incomprehensible and pained, graced his ears for minutes before they calmed._

_"Then...what do I do...?"_

_"You either let his week pass or you can slake his need.…no obligation to do so if...arrange to have another alpha brought to him..."_

_"No!" he cried, whimpering pitifully at the thought of a stranger touching him, molesting him in his mania. "I-I don't....please, don't..."_

_The ordeal turned quickly from overwhelming to terrifying. He felt nausea roil in his stomach and it overcame him as he turned, wrenching his arm at an awkward angle as he retched over the side of the bed. Elros and Maglor rushed over to him, hands soothing his back and brushing his hair out of his face gently as drool dripped sluggishly from his chin, which was wiped away with a cloth. He shook now with a mix of lust and terror and he no longer wanted anything but to slip into sleep or have death claim him. Words echoed into his ringing ears, distant and frantic._

_"Are you certain he's not sick, Maglor?"_

_"No, I am certain. This reaction, however, is unknown to me. Omegas generally aren't ill as a part of their need..."_

_He cried in earnest now, tears flowing down his cheeks and the both of them shushed him quietly. Hands petted his hair and he tried to twist away from them weakly, the heat abating and a cold terror replacing it. Maglor's deep voice broke through the icy feeling._

_"He might be cooling down for a time. The heat comes in waves and lasts for about a week. Elrond, can you speak?"_

_He nodded, looking up into dark eyes as his own were wide with fear, the nausea not as severe now but still present. "Y-Yes..."_

_"What are you feeling now?" Maglor asked, his voice quiet. "Do you feel warm?"_

_He shook his head. "I-I want this to stop..."_

_"I know, Elrond..." Condescension laced Maglor's tone but instead of raising his ire he could only frown in response. "It will pass in time."_

_"Want…t-to die..."_

_Maglor stepped back a tad at that, an expression he couldn't puzzle out clear on his face. After a time he turned back to Elros. "Even if you do not sate him, Elros, watch him carefully. I have never seen such a negative reaction to an omega's heat before."_

_"Will he be alright?!" Elros' voice became frantic, though the voices wavered in and out._

_"Yes, in time..." Maglor replied. "... supplies sent for you..."_

_"How do you... ?"_

_"I am an alpha...Maedhros...my omega…take care of him..."_

_The realization struck him and though the terror did not abate, he relaxed a fraction, knowing someone here felt what he did. He was not alone._

_Maglor left with little preamble and he tensed once more. Sniffling, he gazed up at his brother, whispering because his throat hurt now._

_"M-My wrist hurts..."_

_Elros nodded and checked it. "You're bleeding...I'll have to take the cuff off and clean it. Are you...going to try and jump me again?"_

_"I don't...know...I want this to end...please help me..."_

_Elros took a minute or two before nodding. They had coupled in the past, even celebrating their day of coming of age with a secret gift of their own. That wasn't a problem._

_"Yes…I'll help you, Elrond. Let me clean your wounds and I'll help you then."_

His urges made their sex fast and needy, Elrond crying in both relief and misery, tears coursing down his cheeks. It was bliss, it felt like nothing else in the world, but it also nauseated him to no end. The feeling of Elros' cock inside him, rough with inexperience and the lack of lubrication, their shared groans of pleasure, the slickness of his cock grinding against the sheets on the bed, it all turned his stomach and made him wish he were dead. It felt wonderful, though, and he would never know how both feelings could coexist. Despite the warmth, he could feel his hands grow cold as he began to fade. He would never do so completely though he wished for it.

He came with Elros' name on his lips.

He ran soon after, clothes on in a dazed haste and his hard-on back soon after. He couldn't be near Elros now, he had to be alone. He felt sick and dirty though it was no one else's fault but his own. Once he'd reached the forest outside of Amon Ereb, he was once again ill and curled up, trembling with anxiety and need. After a while he kept moving, desperate to outrun this terrible affliction and remove himself from the world. The winter bit at him, snow piled on the ground and cold to the touch. He found a sharp rock and tried to cut at his cock, at his wrists, any place where the skin was thin and would easily give into his ministrations. Still neither set of wounds would kill him or abate the need that lanced through him with every loud wail he released.

It was several days before Elros and Maedhros found him unconscious, bloodied and face down near a stream he'd tried to drink from before weakness took over. His heat had passed but in its wake the heat of life had left him as well. Elros told him later that he had felt colder than he knew any living being could feel. It took weeks for him to recover, bedridden and ashamed every time Elros had to assist him. His brother would tell him he loved him and that he would take care of him for however long they lived but that only made guilt flare up.

Each subsequent heat would be treated much the same way, Elrond begging to be fucked and then trying to run afterwards. He would never get far, though, guards poised to bring him back to Elros where he refused to be touched, sitting stiffly in fear of the next wave of heat. Elros read books or wrote while Elrond stayed this way, though there would always be a time when Elrond's silence broke out into a heartbreaking cry, which made Elros pause his work and hug his brother tightly, whispering sweet nothings while Elrond clutched at him, desperate for comfort despite feeling the fading sensation taking hold.

Their caretakers never said anything. Elrond and Elros both knew now why they were gone often in their childhood. The both of them never interrupted and Maglor and Maedhros did the same. Still, he would always notice a fresh pair of clothing and a small sweet treat left for him at the end of his week along with a note written in childish scrawl. Elrond ignored the sweets, having never developed a fondness for them, but he always read the notes. He knew they could only come from the left hand of someone trained more with a sword than a pen, but the sentiment gave him mixed feelings of support and loathing even if Maedhros understood his plight. He likely didn't, as he had read books on the subject and nausea from sex was virtually unheard of, the loathing of it rare. Maedhros likely enjoyed himself like everyone else.

When Elros died, Elrond ran out into the woods around Lindon and tried to slit his throat with his hunting knife, knowing he could not go on with his heats without Elros to guide him. His hand shook too much and because it was slicked with blood from a prior kill it flew out of his hand into a fast moving, deep stream. He yelled out in anguish.

An elf maid washing laundry found him sitting by the stream, cross-legged and crying silently. She left him be when he scowled at her wordlessly.

He was alone.

\----

_He burst into Gil-Galad's tent, shaking. His armor felt too tight and he knew the rest of the signs when he felt them._

_Gil-Galad looked up from his maps and his mouth set in a line. "Is it time?"_

_He frowned and looked at him with the fear he felt every time a new heat emerged. This was the fear of an altogether different sort of battle. "Please..."_

_Warm, strong arms embraced him and battle worn hands pet his hair, though he detested the affection._

_"Shh...relax, melamin, and I will take care of you."_

_He was led to a small area meant for sleep where a pile of cushions served as a bed. His armor was removed in a haze and he was stripped bare. Gil-Galad removed his own armor and clothing and laid down on the cushions. He was reluctant to follow, knowing what was going to happen, but warm hands gently grasped his and brought him to his knees. He wanted this, there was no doubt, for the torture at the hands of orcs would have been much worse._

_He instantly sat in his lover's lap, kissing him hard and fast. Gil-Galad always let him set the pace for their trysts, which did help his anxiety a tad. Holding his face in his hands he nibbled and sucked, moving his mouth down to his neck. Gil-Galad hummed in approval, smiling as hands roughly started to explore and grope and grab, eventually settling on stroking his cock expertly, teasing the head with his thumb. Before it could get too far, however, Gil-Galad grabbed his hand and moved it away, grinning._

_"You need me, Elrond, don't have me spend before I can fuck you."_

_Oh, how he loved and hated how his lover spoke so rudely for such royal etiquette._

_A hand wrapped around his cock and he let out a low moan, thrusting up into it wantonly. There was already a liberal coating of precome which meant Gil-Galad simply stroked him once or twice before stroking himself with the fluid. He paused the hand, though, moving to kneel between the legs of his king where he deserved to be. This was his penance for such terrible feelings he felt. He should enjoy this like everyone else did. He shouldn't have been so selfish in the past with his heat. So he would make himself enjoy it and have his lust be selfless for once._

_"Let m-me...w-worship you, my k-king..."_

_Trembling from need, he wrapped his lips around the head of his king's cock and sucked softly in reverence. He wasn't good enough for him, he never would be, but this was something he could do well. He'd heard the whispers around camp, the ones saying he was a filthy whore who had slept his way to the herald position he held. He believed them in times like this as he took him into his mouth properly, sucking and swallowing the precome that dripped from his king like it was honey, though it turned his stomach all the same. The sounds of Gil-Galad's pleasure were drowned out by his heart throbbing and the thoughts that he was less than dirt, that he didn't deserve to be sucking this cock. Selfish yet again. Tears came to his eyes as he took his king all the way into his mouth, choking. His nausea began again but he ignored it in favor of trying his best to please. He just wanted Gil-Galad to spend so that he could not be fucked, he couldn't stomach the feeling of a cock inside him now, even if it would bring him so much more ecstasy than this degredation. There were words being spoken to him, stern and yet clearly lustful. He had gone cold, as if he had walked the vast, icy expanses of the North. His hair was tugged on, tilting his head back, and the cock was pulled out of his mouth._

_The seed that coated his face just made him feel all the more disgusting and ashamed, dripping down his cheek and mouth._

_Buzzing was all that he could hear, staring blankly, though a voice distantly called to him, nearly frantic._

_"Elrond...Elrond, please, speak to me...!"_

_He hadn't even finished himself. He was so happy, he had been selfless. He had done what he'd wanted to do._

_He was done._

_He got up on legs barely able to carry his weight, but he could only make it a couple of steps before he collapsed to his hands and knees, nausea flooding through him as he laughed weakly between dry heaves, blood dripping from his lips after one particularly harsh cough. Still he was overjoyed, even as hands held his hair back and a voice sung quietly to him. He would have to be penetrated, though and soon he collapsed into a heap on the floor, trying not to cry from the realization._

_His king carried him to a different pile of cushions, one meant specifically for him to calm down on, to bring himself back to the world before he stepped out into the fray once more. His face was cleaned of the seed and whatever blood there was. He didn't feel the cloth at all, only the numb shame of feeling disgustingly infantile. There Gil-Galad left him while he worked, respecting the need for his herald's privacy. The cushions were next to his desk, however, so Gil-Galad could watch him in case he started to scratch at himself like he did often without restraints. He wanted nothing but solitude in his feelings of disgust and revulsion, he wanted to be clean of it but his skin always felt dirty. Gil-Galad would kneel in front of him, hold his hands, and kiss them gently whenever he did that._

_"Don't harm yourself, melamin. You are clean. I know you are clean. I know you don't believe me, so I will hold your hands until you do."_

They would embrace for a long while until Elrond could speak properly again, was completely lucid, and only then would they regain their armor and go back out to defend against Sauron and his servants.

When Gil-Galad had died, Elrond had scratched his arms raw that night in his tent, even if his heat was not there. It was something that reminded him of his king, the title now in his hands and he had to decide what to do with it. At the moment, he wanted nothing more than to have hands gentle despite their ferocity in battle pull his away from his arms and kiss them so lovingly.

No one stopped him as he created line after line of red, weeping streaks that accurately portrayed his grief. If anyone saw him at the canteen with arms haphazardly bandaged the next morning, nobody questioned it.

\-----

He had tried to find partners after Gil-Galad. Not just a person to help him in his need but a bondmate. Perhaps that would halt the never-ending cycle of tearing his heart to pieces with each person lost to him. Erestor gladly assisted once or twice but when their professional relationship was in jeopardy, the two calmly and amicably parted ways, still friendly and sociable with one another. 

Lindir was, to most people's surprise, an alpha. He'd scented Elrond one time, though the aftermath was horrific, Lindir's sense of empathy being too much for the anxiety-ridden man he'd just helped to completion. He profusely apologized while Elrond wanted nothing more than to silence him by both ripping his vocal cords out and smothering him in kisses. Their relationship as lord and servant would also be frowned upon, so they were a secret. After a while, Lindir met another woman, Cellin, and they broke their partnership on an equally friendly note. He even took tea with the both of them happily on occasion.

Thranduil, on the rare times he'd see the reclusive and slightly unhinged Elvenking, was of no help. Not only was he hundreds of miles away across mountains and rivers, he too was an omega. It wasn't unheard of for two omegas to be together, as well as two alphas, but their heats could not be assuaged by one another. Plus, Thranduil's raucous, rude, and sarcastic manner was somewhat off-putting to Elrond, though the two were friendly enough and their territories were on good terms. Still, living with him would mean wanting to punch him in the snide face too often for his liking.

Cirdan was another rare sight and he too was an omega. The kind hearted shipwright respected his stance on things, however, and they often communicated via letters about their experiences. Though Cirdan was not sex repulsed as Elrond himself was, the man still was asexual and had no partner of his own. Together they had come up with many coping mechanisms and strategies to help their shared situations, which was where the padding in his restraints came from. It was nice to know that there was someone else in the world that experienced the same lack of attraction that he did among all of the sexual undertones in the world.

There was also one of his rangers, Belanthir. A quiet, yet optimistic man, his battle-scarred visage mirrored his own and so he never judged Elrond on the marks that littered his skin. He'd served under Elrond in Lindon and the Battle of the Last Alliance, which meant that to him, Elrond was more than just an omega but a leader and a warrior. Theirs were often the most gentle of encounters, the most tolerable heats, and Elrond almost found the same love in Belanthir as he did Gil-Galad. However, with his ranger gone so often it hurt his heart to attach to someone so flighty. They broke off their brief relationship and soon after Belanthir vanished without a trace on one of his missions. His whereabouts went unknown and after several years Elrond stopped looking. He hoped that Belanthir was safe wherever he was and not in battle with anything.

He stopped trying to find a partner after that. People came to him, in fact, and he would turn them down. They weren't worth the effort, the energy. He had to protect himself now, make sure he could still function and be a proper leader, even if that meant being solitary in his life.

\----- 

Elrond twisted and writhed in his restraints, trying not to cry out from the need that coursed through his veins.  

He should have bound his hands, they were itching to penetrate himself, stroke himself to an unsatisfying completion, even if he detested the very thought of either of those things. Instead he bit his hand so hard he tasted blood, trying to fight the boiling blood within that threatened to send him into oblivion. He scratched at his arms to try and tear himself out of the misery, blood droplets bubbling up in the wake of his nails. His cock leaked nearly constantly now, leaving him looking debauched and disgraced with a pool of precome on his stomach and trailing sluggishly down his side whenever he turned where he lay. The simple urge to thrust his hips into the air was becoming hard to fight, even if it would yield nothing but more frustration. He longed to be fucked, though it was all a blur of lust that blended into one thought as he slumped back onto his bed, exhaustion claiming him only briefly.

He hated every second of this.

In his hiding place in the woods he would scream and shout all he could but not here. The people of Imladris didn't know why their leader disappeared on a semi-regular basis. They all assumed he was an alpha and that he was simply traveling for political needs or to slake an unknown omega's need, which he preferred. It meant he wasn't aware of his status until it affected him, he could pretend he wasn't this lust-consumed, filthy wreck most of the time. Here, though, he had to silence himself as he bit into a pillow to keep from making any sound. He was better than this, he was a warrior, a soldier, a leader of many. He couldn't be reduced to this, this mewling creature willing to whore himself to whoever showed interest. He wanted to be ill but the nausea was quickly replaced by more lust as the slight withdrawal ended and he was thrust back into the throes of his hell.

It would be over within a week.

\-----

Celebrian sat in one of the lavish courtyards of Imladris the next day, smiling as her friends spoke of tales nonsensical in nature when an odd scent touched her nose. It was subtle, flitting by before she could really process it in a gust of wind coming down from the cliffs. 

It was like the sweetest honeyed ale and she wanted to taste it.

She had always known she was an alpha. Female alphas weren't rare in Arda, particularly among elves where the ratio was quite even when it came to gender. Her concentration had clearly flagged when one of her friends tapped her on the shoulder.

"Celebrian? Are you alright?"

She wasn't sure. 

"I think I will take a walk to clear my head. I'm rather preoccupied with my thoughts." she replied, though she wasn't convinced of her lie's reception. 

She had to follow where that scent had come from.

After a while of searching, it seemed it had come from Lord Elrond's home, which was strictly off limits for visitors unless invited in by Erestor's orders as Elrond had taken ill. Celebrian knew of Lord Elrond's powers of foresight, ones that were similar to her mother's. Perhaps he had seen some sort of unknown threat and was preparing?

Then came a sound, muffled but on the wind combined with the same rich scent that sent Celebrian's head spinning, the source one of the high windows from up on the balcony overlooking the city.

It was a whimper, almost a moan.

It certainly had to be louder than it sounded to her ears, though, and it wasn't one of pain either.

She would find him and put his lust to rest.

\-----

Elrond stroked his cock with quick, frantic flicks of his wrist. He wasn't really getting anything out of the sensation but the overwhelming need for more, his vocal desperation loud in his ears while he bit his hand again as a particularly loud whimper escaped him, whining in pain. 

He felt utterly pathetic. 

He'd come long ago and many times since, the mere touch of his hand to his cock enough to tip him over the edge after so much denial. Still, he rubbed himself off even if his orgasms had become dry and painful, his cock red and raw from the treatment. It wasn't enough, it never was enough, he would hurt himself in his pleasure just as he hurt knowing it was what had to be done. He was a pathetic whore that would do nothing but have someone inside him by now, as terrible, horrible as the concept sounded. He was base, he was nothing but the need that exuded from him in the scent that now likely left the windows of his damned open home.

Soon he would have all the alphas in Imladris gathering to find him, find out his secret that would shame him and have everyone jeer and laugh. Then they would fuck him senseless, one by one, and he would be helpless to stop them. He would have one inside him and another, a woman, below as he fucked her only to be impaled on the man's cock on each thrust, sending him into a euphoric frenzy. There might be two men, even, his lips stretched around one while he was fucked by the other. A woman might even penetrate him, false phalluses made not of flesh but of wood or stone feeling like not quite enough but enough to tease while he licked at another's quim eagerly like a cat with milk. The alphas would blend together until he didn't know who was sating him, only that he would be left panting, covered in seed and sweat and grime.

Part of Elrond wished that would happen just so he wouldn't have to be a secret anymore even if the ensuing orgy would leave him broken and ashamed beyond repair. He might even fade away into nothing, something he'd hoped for for centuries. He imagined the numb nothingness or even the sweet peace of Valinor where he would no longer be cursed with this affliction, where he could live without the lust and need that consumed him.

Tears sprung to his eyes as he came once more, this time silent in his pain as he slumped over onto his side. This was only the second day. This sudden heat was worse than any he had experienced before save for the first. Elrond could only hope that this one would be short and the time between this and the next be longer than usual. His whole body shook both with exhaustion and anxiety, the urge to be ill becoming stronger, the cold seeping into his fingers. He would survive this, though. He had survived many others before it, he could do it again. By some gift or curse of the Valar he would not be allowed to fade even though in the moment it was all that he desired.

A knock at his door made him yelp, struggling to get out of the restraints he made for himself. He couldn't believe it, his people didn't abide by his orders.

"L-Lindir, I swear b-by the Valar, leave m-me alone!"

No response, only a hand at the doorknob.

He was found. They were coming for him.

\-----

Celebrian had tracked down the very door where the scent came from. With a shaking hand, she knocked firmly.

A yelp sounded from inside, one of terror, and muffled rustling could be heard. Celebrian knew who had to be in there, though why she had only one idea and she couldn't nor wouldn't believe it. 

Lord Elrond was an omega. Her disbelief was partly due to the openly non-sexual reputation he held. There had been rumors that he'd had lovers, but if they were true no one could verify them. For all intents and purposes Elrond was an island of his own person, uninterested in the various suitors that vied for his affections.

Omegas weren't always overtly sexual, particularly among elves who were more modest in that respect, but they almost always held a casual air about them. They accepted their status and normally bonded with a partner or rarely engaged with many when their heats came. Alphas were more like Elrond, aloof and generally disinterested in much, at least until a scent came along which piqued their interest. Celebrian couldn't pretend to know anything about Elrond's habits, though, considering the fact that even those that lived near him day by day knew little about his romantic or sexual interests. For all it seemed it was as if he had none to begin with and his life was cold, loveless.

The sound of heaving sobs combined with retching worried her more. Trying to open the door, she found it locked. Elrond was in no state to open the door so she had to think.

Her life spent in the trees could come in handy.

Finding the balcony, Celebrian easily hopped onto the railing and found a ridge of decorative stone in the side of the house that led around to where Elrond's bedroom was located. Holding onto the roofing she sidled her way over carefully, the distance below her not a concern as it wasn't a sheer drop by any means. At Elrond's window, she peeked in and almost fell from the precipice at the sight despite how she should have anticipated it.

The great Lord Elrond lay on the floor, shaking violently and curled into a ball, as naked as the day he was born. The scent he exuded was tantalizing and intoxicating but Celebrian knew this was not a normal omega in heat by his rigid frame, the tightly closed legs...everything screamed aversion rather than wanton lust.

_I am not an omega....leave!_

The voice shouted in her head and Celebrian knew it was his osanwe. Some of the thoughts were targeted at her and others were his control over his mind slipping.

"No. You're not well, my lord, and it's obvious you are an omega. I can smell you." she replied, slowly entering the window with a grace unnatural for such an act. "I won't hurt you."

_I have heard that before...please leave, don't tell anyone..._

"I won't leave. I won't tell a soul of what happens here, however, if it causes you stress."

_I hate this...I don't want this at all...please help me..._

Elrond's shaking didn't cease but he looked up, the image breaking Celebrian's heart. Tears streaked his face, puffy eyes and nose red, a deep frown set in his expression. His eyes spoke what volumes his voice could not.

_I want to stop this...I feel sick but I need...I-I know you are a woman, but...I cannot...it hurts now..._

The pleading tone in Elrond's thoughts further hurt Celebrian as she knelt and gently brushed locks of sweat soaked hair out of his face, even though Elrond flinched at the touch.

"Shhh...I want to calm you as much as possible before I help you. You're breathing too quickly. We can figure something out to help you but first you need to breathe."

Celebrian's hands ghosted over his heated skin, rubbing his back gently. She'd learned how to control her urge to engage long ago thanks to her mother's aid which left her able to treat him so kindly. Elrond's breathing slowed a minute amount each time, his eyes becoming less fright filled and more pleading. 

_I need you...you or anyone else....anything..._

The additional thoughts she heard were downright painful.

_I'm such a pitiful whore....reduced to this, so disgustingly vile and repulsive..._

A thought occurred to Celebrian. "If...you can't...well...would a fake phallus suffice?"

Elrond keened and nodded. _For...For the moment, yes..._

"Alright, then. Let me see the damage."

Celebrian wanted to make sure he hadn't hurt himself too badly, though she was dismayed to find his cock in such an abused state when he rolled over onto his other side. It would need salve and other things, things Elrond clearly didn't possess in his bedroom.

_Couldn't h-help it....it didn't work, i-it just hurt so much...I-I normally go somewhere else, I have healing m-materials there..._

"Shh...it's alright." she cooed, petting his hair. It was clear Elrond didn't like the attention but it was something he needed. "It's what happens in heat."

Eventually Celebrian was able to stop most of Elrond's tremors, sat him up, and helped him back to the bed. Finding a decanter of water and a glass, she poured some and pressed the cup into his hands.

"Drink. I'm sure you haven't so far and you don't want to dehydrate."

Elrond complied, sipping the water to get the bitter taste of bile out of his mouth. He wasn't sure what to make of this alpha, as she wasn't immediately jumping on him to sate his need. Many in between Elros and Gil-Galad had been coarse and rude, merely fucking him into a wall or bed or the floor without care for his disgust and those heats had been the worst. He'd be left laying in a pool of sweat, come, and often blood while sobbing and there would be no comfort for him. Eventually he gave up trying to sate himself which felt so much better.

Instead of such neglect she tidied the room, pushing the bookcase back to its proper place before setting what books that had fallen back on the shelves with delicate fingers he couldn't help but to marvel at and watch intently.

Elrond had met Celebrian before, long before, and he'd fallen head over heels for her at first sight. He'd seen her in his dreams, all platinum blonde hair and bright eyes smiling in their own right in the pale sunlight of a winter morning. He'd never said a word, of course, too afraid of his own feelings more than hers to make any action. This was the last way he'd wanted to see her, though, and he would have never considered her an alpha.

"I'm sorry...."

It was the first verbal words out of his mouth, though raspy they were from lack of proper use.

"I'm sorry, Celebrian, you shouldn't have to do this, not to...with me, I'm not a normal omega...I-I'm ill whenever I...I don't like it at all, it's always felt terrible to me...bearable at best...I-I think you should leave..."

Celebrian turned to face him, kneeling before the bed to cup his face in her hands. "My lord, I would not be here if I didn't wish to be. You are my highest priority and I saw the way you gazed at me. Did it not occur to you to say hello?"

A red tinge to his already flushed cheeks made its way up to his ears as he looked down at the floor in shame. "I did not think..."

Celebrian felt a twinge of regret at the way she said that. It was clear that was a sensitive topic. She took his rough, battle ready hands in hers, delicate and soft, in a startlingly similar way Gil-Galad would. It pained her to see scars up and down both arms and wrists, marred by the recent scratches, scars clearly not gained in battle. "You are afraid, Lord Elrond. You dislike this, the love and sexual activity, because as much as you need it, it also hurts you and very few have understood that. You have never had long term lovers, not one bondmate...you prefer celibacy, solitude, because there is no pain in it."

Elrond nodded, tears coming to his eyes. How could she know? He never let on to anyone that he desired comfort.

Celebrian could tell he was fighting to keep himself under control, the tremors returning that signaled another wave.

"There has to be another way..."

"Would you prefer it if I simply tried to support you? It could help to have someone by your side. I won't touch you unless it will be beneficial to you, however." Celebrian offered.

"Perhaps...I would be so tempted by you, though, you're breathtakingly beautiful..."

Elrond's hands reached upwards to touch her face gently, lust-heavy eyes darkening with need.

"Please....let me have you, my beautiful savior..."

"No, it would only sicken and hurt you further." Celebrian backed away and looked towards the foot of the bed. "Are those...?"

"They keep me from moving..." Elrond explained simply, gesturing to the drawers as he fought to keep his urges down, the physical show of it in the tenseness of his shoulders and arms and legs. He was restraining every muscle from doing anything he'd regret, exerting more control than she had ever used. It took someone truly repulsed by the act to completely resist the urges of heat. "There are wrist restraints, too."

Celebrian watched as hidden restraint anchors came into view. "I believe they would do you well so you don't injure yourself further."

Elrond nodded, grimacing from the stress. "Then...hurry, it's starting again..."

With nimble hands she restrained him to the bed as he'd indicated. Once she was sure he was secure, she sat back in an armchair by the bed, brushing his hair out of his face. "I will be here, Elrond. I won't leave unless necessary."

Sweat dripped down Elrond's brow as he gazed at her, the throes of his heat taking over again after one last thought entered her mind.

_Thank you..._

\-----

The week passed, though not without incident. Celebrian wasn't sure what was more painful, the fact that Elrond had shown so negative of responses to his biological condition or that she couldn't and wouldn't do anything to help stem the symptoms. On one occasion he had even moaned in agony before pleading for death to take him. Only a tincture meant for sleep stopped the babbled requests which had seen him through the end of the week.

Still, once his heat had abated and he'd awoken from his sleep, Elrond promptly kicked Celebrian out. She figured that might be the case and left him be, even though she would be returning home to Lothlorien within the next few days. It saddened her that she might not see him again in his normal state, though it was clear Elrond valued his privacy over almost anything and everything else.

A letter arrived to her via Erestor as she was packing her things to leave.

"Lord Elrond told me to deliver this to you. He is ill at the moment and sends his apologies for not being able to see your party off and for his extended absence throughout most of your visit."

"It's quite alright." she replied, knowing all too well how ill he must be after his ordeal. "Send him my regards, I enjoyed his company while it lasted."

"Aye. He also notes that should you wish or need to visit again in the future, he would be most delighted to host you and your kin."

Celebrian smiled as she opened the letter, written in flowing, beautiful handwriting. "I would love to return."

She read the note and heard Elrond's voice in her head.

_My ~~-dear-~~ ~~-love-~~ friend, _

_I thank you for the...service you have provided me. ~~-Though obviously it wasn't a service in a lewd-~~ The ordeal is quite stressful and I certainly would not have coped as well as I had without your company. ~~-As well as I can cope, in any case-~~ Should you return and I am...indisposed again, I will let you know beforehand if possible. This was a rather sudden occurrence, as the prior had occurred not three months before. ~~-I wish you had been th-~~ Hopefully this means the next one will be farther in the future, though I cannot see when. ~~-Perhaps you may help me if I-~~_

_I seem to be rambling, I do apologize. Have a safe trip home to Lothlorien and send my regards to your mother and father. I plan on traveling in four months' time to Lothlorien for discussions of trade. ~~I would love to see you.~~_

A laugh bubbled up from Celebrian as she finished the note, the last line crossed out so forcefully that the words were nearly illegible. He had tried so hard to sound polite and formal despite how they spent most of their week together. It was actually rather....cute.

And if anything, it was cuter for her to see Elrond out on his balcony the day she left Imladris, wrapped in comfortable sleep robes and looking the part of a tired, bedraggled lord before she left. He smiled weakly at her and she blew a kiss to him when no one was looking.

_I will see you again?_

She nodded.

She felt a surge of happiness from him, one she had a feeling he hadn't felt in a long time.

_Wonderful._


End file.
